Being a good host means looking out for all your guests, right? Well, one Redditor found herself feeling awkward at a BBQ hosted by her ex’s friends. The 37-year-old shared her experience, saying it was her first time being invited by ‘ex-boyfriend’s friends’ to join them for a pre-drink/BBQ. Before heading over, her boyfriend casually mentioned, “his friend messaged and said the host feels bad because they are having a BBQ and there may not be enough food for everyone, so if we see food lying around to not feel bad about it.”
At first, the Redditor thought this was cool and “assumed he meant they’d have already eaten and we were joining after.” But when they arrived, things took a turn. It quickly became obvious that no one had touched the food! Out of the 12 invited guests, only eight were seated for dinner while the other four were left hanging. She recalled, “When it came to meal time, the 8 of them sat around a nicely set table and chowed down without making eye contact with us while we stood on the outside of the table chatting. I thought this was so weird, my ex did not, I guess? It was awkward because we were actually starving!”
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The story does not end here. The Redditor shared that when the meal was done, the host got up and said “Guys, please help yourself!” to the leftovers. The woman found it odd and while her ex went and got some food on a plate and said “Come eat”, she shared that she “just couldn’t get myself to do it. I don’t even know these people and it was so uncomfortable. I politely said, no thank you! And carried on my conversation. Well, my ex was so bothered by this reaction from me, it ruined the whole evening for him and we actually broke up after that (he broke up with me).”
She further added, “He had originally said we would just eat together at the street festival so I was bothered that he put me in that position and then was mad at me for choosing not to eat and grabbing a snack on the street?”
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Feeling shocked and confused, the Redditor, who is from Canada, wondered, “Is this culturally normal behaviour for some people? I live in Canada, and I could never eat in front of a guest in my home and not feed them but is this normal behaviour for some? Was I rude or in the wrong for doing this? Or was he gaslighting me by being mad and making me feel like the rude person for declining food?”
The post went viral on Reddit with more than 13K upvotes and 1.5K comments.
A comment read, “No, this is so weird. To specifically single out guests to only get leftovers while the ‘first’ crew gets their pick?? I don’t know ANYONE who would do this.”
Another added, “I’m with you. I never eat until everyone else at my home has made a plate and I always make sure to have enough food.”
A third wrote, “This sounds like a mess. Why would you invite people to a barbecue whom you can’t feed?”
Another chimed in, “What culture would eating in front of others be anyway??? Very weird and rude, I would’ve left after seeing them all sit down to eat in front of you guys.”
What do you think of this BBQ invitation? Share your views in the comments section.
